Were due 5 weeks apart. We were also born on the same day 7 years apart. People thought we planned to be pregnant at the same time, we didn’t. We were so excited – we teased over who was going to have a boy (I won 😉), we were going to do a joint maternity shoot, we were even dreaming about joint birthday parties.
After my loss I asked her to forgive me in advance because I wasn’t going to be able to be who I usually am. I’m the one that washes clothes before use, separates them by size, labels the containers, helps to set up the nursery. But I knew I wasn’t going to be able to do that this time.
My sister and brother in law went out of town this past weekend and I volunteered to keep my nieces (ages 2 years (Zara) and 3 months (Ivy)). This past weekend was the first time I saw Ivy in person. Even though I had never met her, I missed her. The first thing I thought was her and Ezra would be best friends.
I needed this weekend. It made my heart so full. It also helped me realize how far I’d come. When I first lost Ezra, I wouldn’t even go inside a store that had a baby section. Here I am caring for an infant that is 5 weeks older than my son would be and I’m enjoying it! I don’t know if it’s the 8 months that have passed, the journaling, the therapy, the meditation, or a combination of all of these things. But whatever it is, it’s working and I’m here for all of it.
Road2Rainbow 